I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize