Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
