she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
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I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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