I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize