There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You ruined the universe
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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