i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Randomize