Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
