when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.