Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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