I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
