I heard we made out
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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