They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
