I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Randomize
