Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?