You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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