All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize