Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
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Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
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He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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