She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
