As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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