Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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