lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize