I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
