This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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