I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
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I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
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Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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