guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
