It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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