Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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