NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I wish they made helmets for livers.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
