How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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