Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize