The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
My liver is preforming stress tests.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize