my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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