To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
