Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Randomize
