She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
