I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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