Kareoke will never be a sober sport
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
