Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Culvers...So Good

  (313): View more from Michigan

  So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.

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  (313): Culvers...So Good (313): So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass. http://tfl.nu/k8xt
  Replies (3) Good night (874) Bad night (1108)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers

  (1-973): View more from New Jersey

  can u grab me a application

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  (973): i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers (1-973): can u grab me a application http://tfl.nu/7bd4
  Replies (11) Good night (2745) Bad night (444)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.

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  (917): My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts. http://tfl.nu/py1e
  Replies (22) Good night (2095) Bad night (3422)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister

  (216): View more from Ohio

  i hate you

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  (330): so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister (216): i hate you http://tfl.nu/9cj0
  Replies (43) Good night (22792) Bad night (1764)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero

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  (410): he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero http://tfl.nu/dyje
  Replies (8) Good night (5406) Bad night (724)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.

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  (203): Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed. http://tfl.nu/aqi9
  Replies (6) Good night (3746) Bad night (1086)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet

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  (716): Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet http://tfl.nu/obun
  Replies (25) Good night (2770) Bad night (1138)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth

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  (540): i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth http://tfl.nu/m5qw
  Replies (6) Good night (860) Bad night (1417)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.

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  (847): That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy. (847): You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth. http://tfl.nu/gv40
  Replies (12) Good night (1970) Bad night (648)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.

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  (732): Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help. http://tfl.nu/m3q1
  Replies (6) Good night (2071) Bad night (737)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever

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  (306): I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever http://tfl.nu/lhkq
  Replies (22) Good night (1412) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber

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  (513): That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber http://tfl.nu/t4y1
  Replies (4) Good night (1345) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.

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  (518): Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors. http://tfl.nu/nr6l
  Replies (2) Good night (1105) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?

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  (845): Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird? http://tfl.nu/8vw8
  Replies (7) Good night (896) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.

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  (480): Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor. http://tfl.nu/8do3
  Replies (0) Good night (389) Bad night (324)

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