Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat

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  (313): Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat http://tfl.nu/xnvb
  Replies (3) Good night (971) Bad night (489)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy

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  (904): So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5 (312): Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy http://tfl.nu/43t9
  Replies (2) Good night (1047) Bad night (550)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.

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  (386): being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop. http://tfl.nu/b39q
  Replies (15) Good night (2746) Bad night (1338)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since

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  (907): He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since http://tfl.nu/78cc
  Replies (2) Good night (2490) Bad night (795)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.

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  (815): It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina. http://tfl.nu/o9qo
  Replies (8) Good night (3839) Bad night (1088)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.

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  (425): I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it. http://tfl.nu/dgh5
  Replies (13) Good night (1093) Bad night (3291)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.

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  (678): Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago. http://tfl.nu/b245
  Replies (13) Good night (1597) Bad night (735)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.

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  (773): I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened. http://tfl.nu/5hv3
  Replies (11) Good night (1269) Bad night (460)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.

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  (952): She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high. http://tfl.nu/dd7j
  Replies (2) Good night (889) Bad night (579)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.

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  (302): This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy. http://tfl.nu/3zpx
  Replies (2) Good night (891) Bad night (358)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.

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  (913): Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon. http://tfl.nu/apie
  Replies (7) Good night (608) Bad night (1050)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao

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  (214): Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao http://tfl.nu/k098
  Replies (5) Good night (1033) Bad night (343)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.

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  (425): On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler. http://tfl.nu/m74v
  Replies (6) Good night (291) Bad night (1191)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?

  (443): View more from Maryland

  YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.

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  (856): He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that? (443): YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE. http://tfl.nu/t1lf
  Replies (3) Good night (504) Bad night (912)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.

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  (360): Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits. http://tfl.nu/3dqo
  Replies (5) Good night (1464) Bad night (300)

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