being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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