I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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