I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize