Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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