the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
he puts the penis in happiness.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
