Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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