you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Randomize
