my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize