I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
The feeling are messing with the penis
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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