God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
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I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
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I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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