I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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