He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
