in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Randomize
