he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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