just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I wish you could order shots online.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
