Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
